8 Years Old
“8 Years Old is one of my most personal songs and one of my only songs that’s really honest about my childhood. It’s definitely on the rawer side for me.”
This song is one of the most personal I’ve ever written. It’s about the trauma I’ve carried from my childhood and how it still affects me today. It all hit me hard when I saw something happen that reminded me of my past, and it triggered a flashback that really shook me. Writing this felt raw and different from what I usually do. It’s about a lot of tough emotions and trying to figure out how to deal with them, not just in a single moment but over many years.
About the song
Lyrics
Just like that, I’m 8 years old
I’m paying for your mistakes, still paying for ‘em
It takes me back, I’m all alone
With people talking round me, only talking
I’m in that house that’s not a home
There is no escape no running from it
I was so young when my mind grew cold
You tore me up and broke me down
You chewed me up and spat me out
I built my walls they’re never coming down
I hang up your photo on every new fracture
I see a sorry on your face
I never heard the words though, never heard ‘em
I hear regret in the way you pray
I don’t know who’s listening, I just don’t
You’re crying for your mistakes, crying from the blame
Crying for the past you let get away
You’re trying, I’m trying but when it mattered you didn’t change
You tore me up and broke me down
You chewed me up and spat me out
I built my walls they’re never coming down
I hang up your photo on every new fracture
My memories on rewind, I’m learning how to be alright
I got my suitcase at the door, I’m going through
My failures on the desk and my regret spilled on the floor
But I don’t live here anymore, yeah I am through
You tore me up and you broke me down
You chewed me up and you spat me out
I built my walls and they’re never coming down
I hang up your photo on every new fracture
Just like that, I’m 8 years old
I’m paying for your mistakes, still paying for ‘em
